tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11349941.post7012037623339535441..comments2023-08-16T03:56:19.093-07:00Comments on The Snail Shell: Why is "smile!" bad? (It's not the Political Correctness Police)Danhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03312048754374286109noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11349941.post-73173800816371163212016-11-12T17:42:06.441-08:002016-11-12T17:42:06.441-08:00Yeah. I think I was too generous to "Smile!&q...Yeah. I think I was too generous to "Smile!" Type A. I've updated the post and the Facebook to hopefully clarify.<br />(for one, I would probably be super pissed anytime someone tried to "Smile!" me, whether they're creepy or not.)Danhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03312048754374286109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11349941.post-74307307429854242132016-11-12T14:05:28.509-08:002016-11-12T14:05:28.509-08:00Yes, and:
Smile type A is more than a little annoy...Yes, and:<br />Smile type A is more than a little annoying. Less obviously problematic than Type B, of course, but it infantalizes the woman, invalidates her feelings, and perpetuates the notion that women have to be likeable and pleasant. They don't. (which I know you know, of course) Maybe she's not smiling because she's constitutionally not a cheerful person; that's allowed. Actually, come to think of it, only the very most cheerful people walk around smiling at nothing, anyway. So maybe she's of constitutionally-average temperament, and just didn't have a special day. Maybe she's not smiling because something really awful just happened; consider how very uncomforting and frustrating it is to be told "it's going to be okay" when it isn't, or when the person doesn't understand. We are much more comforted when we are heard and empathized with than when we are told there is no need to feel how we feel. And, as I commented on FB, telling women their feelings are wrong, subtly and persistently over time, undermines their trust in their own perceptions, making it harder to get out of a bad situation or to feel justified in reporting assault when it happens. Vickinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11349941.post-66478569445141234072016-11-11T13:09:53.708-08:002016-11-11T13:09:53.708-08:00Ah, found it, nevermind :) Good job!Ah, found it, nevermind :) Good job!Danielhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03733294559333002785noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11349941.post-60711523914363676282016-11-11T13:04:15.557-08:002016-11-11T13:04:15.557-08:00Which post yesterday? Facebook?Which post yesterday? Facebook?Danielhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03733294559333002785noreply@blogger.com