Wednesday, August 10, 2005

"'Cause there's no way that I'll sleep when you're near me."

Umm. Sorry, there have been a bunch of posts the last few days. If you want quality, start at the bottom and work your way up- I can't guarantee the quality of these last couple.


This wouldn't be a blog without a gush about music. Good lord, Architecture in Helsinki, why have you forced me to listen to you for the past 2 days? Why are you already dominating my Top 50 most played? Is it too early to make you a triumvirate with the Arcade Fire and the Fiery Furnaces? (if you like these bands, listen to AiH, similar style). Is there a name for this genre? (it might be "Baroque Pop," I'm not sure) Basically, how are you so good, and how soon are you coming to Pittsburgh?

(on a side note, Zach Harris, if you're taking a trip to Cleveland to see Sufjan, I'm definitely in)

(on another side note, Beck 09-25 Cleveland, OH - House of Blues... I'm just sayin')


So, with a heavy heart, I turn down the CA'ship with Rich Pattis and 15-200.

  • I don't have time for 6 classes, how would I have time for 5 classes plus CA'ing?

  • I would really rather TA a math class

  • Well, like point #1, it's a big time sucker. 10-15 hrs/week of free time gone.



It's point #3 that I'm the most questioning about. I don't feel like it's unreasonable to work during the school year. Obviously it's not, a lot of people (including many of you readers) do. However, last semester was pretty crunchy at times, and like I said, I wouldn't want to take 6 classes. But when am I going to TA a math class then? Will next semester be easier? And don't just tell me not to TA.

This is largely my mom's argument. It's a lot of work TA/CA'ing, and I had enough work last semester. College is a great part of your life, why speed through it and waste time CA'ing a job you aren't really sure you want? My mom's telling me to relax! Take it easy!... this may be one of the first times in my life that I've decided to "take it easy." Now, "easy" still includes about 50 units, including 212 and Computational Discrete Math. This semester won't be much easier than last, if any. But I've taken the easy road out of working.

This bugs me! I've never taken the easy road out! Why am I justifying it now? And here is The Official Take-It-Easy-Dan party platform on this issue: I earned a ton this summer. I'm planning on putting that all into college. If someone were to call me out, I could say "look, I put n thousand dollars into my college. what have you done?" Even though said person may have worked more hours, it might end up being less money. But something about this seems unfair. My family has enough money (I'm not saying to brag, I'm just sayin') that I don't have to work during the school year. As a consequence, I get to enjoy it more than others? I get to party a lot? Something about this is inherently unjust, and I don't quite have my finger on it yet. I mean, I guess it's obvious: it's unfair that I get the easy road.

At the same time, I'm trying to avoid taking the easy road. For example, this summer, like I said, I put in 40 hours/week for a lot of weeks at a job I didn't really like so I'll have a big bundle of cash to put into college. Most of my friends my age worked at random jobs making half as much. So I guess there's a credit for me- I took the extra effort to get a nicer job. But what about my friends? What about my one friend, a skiing prodigy, who's giving it up because he doesn't have enough money to do that and play frisbee? What about my friends who have jobs they don't like so that they can afford to stay in school?

Abe Lincoln would have one for this: "You can't strengthen the weak by weakening the strong." If I don't have to work, great, more power to me. Also this: my sanity. Maybe I can't do it all. Maybe I've hit a limit: I just can't take all these classes, be in SnS and whatever else I'm in, and work too. Without this job, I will exercise more, I will go to Free Ride, I will join the Explorers' Club (or whatever it's called), I will find the Pittsburgh Rock Gym, I will host more parties, I will meet more people, I will cook more, I will sleep more, instead of CA'ing. I will be a happier and healthier person without it. You, my friends, will probably find me a better person to spend time with because I will have more sleep and more energy. As this summer has shown me, I need a break. So maybe I'm doing the right thing after all: working would appease my perverse egalitarian socialist idea of justice, but at the cost of me doing great things. And I'm not grinding down to the nuts and bolts of pragmatism just yet- I'm still riding the high tide of idealism. Maybe, just maybe, life can be this good forever.

This argument still doesn't sit well with me. Someone call me out, or play devil's advocate, sometime and we'll hash it out and see if I really am a lazy no-goodnik or if I'm doin' the best I can.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Definitely seeing Sufjan in Cleveland. Gerrit offered to drive. I'm holding out hope that Beck will randomly add a date in Pittsburgh. If he doesn't, I might be interested in coming to Cleveland for it.

PS. If we do decide to see Sujan, we should get tickets ASAP.

PPS. Based almost entirely on your last post (and a quick iTunes appraisal) I ordered - at full price - the latest AiH album. I also ordered the newest album by the Ponys. Have you heard them? I like them.

PPPS. This is Zach.

chicken said...

I, too, am in for Beck but not for Sufjan (zeugma?)-- unless Zach successfully convinces me that I think otherwise.

Additionally, I do have a good deal of advice about the CAing thing, but I'm just going to shoot you a personal email now, cuz t'aint nobody's business.