On an upswing, everything is fast and colorful and energetic! And I say yes to things. I have physical energy to do things. I have willpower to resist things. I have mental energy to think about and plan things. I have ... interpersonal energy? ... to really care about people.
I remember a couple of these in recent history: while making Is it a Party? and after realizing I wanted to go to grad school. This one doesn't have such a cause. So why is it happening?
Blame it on a lot of things: nice weather, having allergy medicine again, making progress at work. Coming back from vacation maybe, but I felt not so great the first week or so after vacation. I did fast for a day on Memorial Day, and thought "wouldn't it be convenient if this were a turning point?" ... maybe it was, coincidentally or not.
Anyway, upswings all end... is this one different? I hope so. The difference this time could be that I'm more focused on compassion. Also, I realize that my previous goals were to minimize all that I don't want, and that approach wasn't working for me, so perhaps I can wisely refill my life now. I'm going a little easier on myself. Maybe I've learned something.
... uhh, talk about feelings on the internet much? whatever, I'm feeling good, I don't care what you think! plus, this is as close to a diary as I have, and I like to record these things.
Oh, unrelatedly, I jumped out of a plane last weekend. I quite recommend it.
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